I am both attracted and repelled by jouissance— can I allow myself to be the passive object of pleasure, can I become active in relation to this jouissance? It is no longer even clear whose pleasure is involved, whether it is my own or that of another. This very vagueness […] is a source of attractiveness.
All someone has to do is be considered a mysterious, or even a dangerous source of pleasure
Paul Verhaeghe, Love In A Time Of Loneliness, pp.168-169
A persons identity is not to be found in behavior … but in the capacity to keep a particular narrative going.